My heart is so full
and I want you to know
how beautiful you are
how much you are cared for
Please hear as He calls you
come to Him
He wants you
Come as you are
Turn from the glistening things of this place
Join the family
He wants you, come to Him
He is waiting for you
Is there anyway you will turn
and truly see the light?
Can I say anything more?
I want you to know how beautiful you are
I want you to know He loves you
more than anyone in this world
Seek Him
He will not fail
His love is perfect
His love is strong
His love changes
His love is real
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Challenge
As defined by the dictionary:
Challenge
–noun
1.
a call or summons to engage in any contest, as of skill, strength, etc.
2.
something that by its nature or character serves as a call to battle, contest, special effort, etc.: Space exploration offers a challenge to humankind.
3.
a call to fight, as a battle, a duel, etc.
4.
a demand to explain, justify, etc.: a challenge to the treasurer to itemize expenditures.
5.
difficulty in a job or undertaking that is stimulating to one engaged in it.
6.
Military . the demand of a sentry for identification or a countersign.
I have found myself using this word multiple times a day and in various conversations in the last few days. I notice that recently I have been challenged to be more intentional and even that is challenging. I am learning that to be challenged is not a bad thing, it is good. I feel that sometimes when it seems I've been challenged it is by the Holy Spirit; He is stretching me to go out of my comfort and do something more than I am now.
This weekend away at camp with the kids of the city was a challenge. Not only in the sense that I was one of two people out of a group of 35 that was white, but also just culturally, I was way out of my so called element.
But again, even with this challenge, I was reminded the importance of flexibility in ministry and life. Challenges are not to be avoided or even to run from, but are to be taken (usually) face on and with confidence. There were moments on this camping trip that I was incredibly uncomfortable and knew that the kids thought I was crazy, but all I could do was respond in love and confidence that I have in Him.
Even just talking with Clive for a few hours there and back was a reminder to me of the recent challenges the Spirit has been revealing in my life. I am encouraged through conversation with Clive, Carlos, Gerald & Confessor that inner city ministry is rough and challenging, but not meaningless.
To end this post I just want to share what Carlos told our kids last night during our Bible time, we talked about church and 'challenged' them to start meeting and studying the Bible with us. Carlos presented the church to us with the focus on a family aspect rather than the building, title or location. With this mindset of church and knowing the backgrounds of the kids present he said this:
"Come to God, He changes the DNA. You don't have to get right before getting to God, come to Him and He'll change you. God wants to adopt you into His family."
If you read this and follow Christ, please pray for those who heard this and know what we are all about, pray that their hearts would soften and desire to go deeper.
If you read this and do not know Him, read that again, I challenge you to come to Him, despite all that is going on in your life and your past, Come to God, He CHANGES DNA! He makes you HIS OWN!
Challenge
–noun
1.
a call or summons to engage in any contest, as of skill, strength, etc.
2.
something that by its nature or character serves as a call to battle, contest, special effort, etc.: Space exploration offers a challenge to humankind.
3.
a call to fight, as a battle, a duel, etc.
4.
a demand to explain, justify, etc.: a challenge to the treasurer to itemize expenditures.
5.
difficulty in a job or undertaking that is stimulating to one engaged in it.
6.
Military . the demand of a sentry for identification or a countersign.
I have found myself using this word multiple times a day and in various conversations in the last few days. I notice that recently I have been challenged to be more intentional and even that is challenging. I am learning that to be challenged is not a bad thing, it is good. I feel that sometimes when it seems I've been challenged it is by the Holy Spirit; He is stretching me to go out of my comfort and do something more than I am now.
This weekend away at camp with the kids of the city was a challenge. Not only in the sense that I was one of two people out of a group of 35 that was white, but also just culturally, I was way out of my so called element.
But again, even with this challenge, I was reminded the importance of flexibility in ministry and life. Challenges are not to be avoided or even to run from, but are to be taken (usually) face on and with confidence. There were moments on this camping trip that I was incredibly uncomfortable and knew that the kids thought I was crazy, but all I could do was respond in love and confidence that I have in Him.
Even just talking with Clive for a few hours there and back was a reminder to me of the recent challenges the Spirit has been revealing in my life. I am encouraged through conversation with Clive, Carlos, Gerald & Confessor that inner city ministry is rough and challenging, but not meaningless.
To end this post I just want to share what Carlos told our kids last night during our Bible time, we talked about church and 'challenged' them to start meeting and studying the Bible with us. Carlos presented the church to us with the focus on a family aspect rather than the building, title or location. With this mindset of church and knowing the backgrounds of the kids present he said this:
"Come to God, He changes the DNA. You don't have to get right before getting to God, come to Him and He'll change you. God wants to adopt you into His family."
If you read this and follow Christ, please pray for those who heard this and know what we are all about, pray that their hearts would soften and desire to go deeper.
If you read this and do not know Him, read that again, I challenge you to come to Him, despite all that is going on in your life and your past, Come to God, He CHANGES DNA! He makes you HIS OWN!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Confidence
The voices I hear tell me I'm nothing, tell me that those girls have power over me and that I am weak.
These voices lie.
I am told to resist the voice of the devil, he has NO power over me. The POWER of Christ IN me is all I need. Who I really am is all because of Jesus and the power of what He did for me. My complete identity is in Him. Why would I loose my thoughts in the lies of the deceiver when the truth is so evident and powerful?
I will continue to resist those voices that whisper in the quiet, crevices of my mind, I will tell them they lie. I will tell them the truth, I will tell them that because of Christ, all these things I fear He knows and holds dear, He will not forsake me, He will forever take care of me, He goes before me, behind me, and all around me. He walks before me, preparing the way and He allows all things to work together for my good, because He loves me.
So I will walk ahead, though this fearful place, through the voices around me saying I won't make it, and into the unknown, but only because I know that the peace of laying all my cares at His feet is real, saving and sweet, I know I will not be harmed, even in the darkest valley, He will forever and ever be at my side. My confidence is in Him alone.
These voices lie.
I am told to resist the voice of the devil, he has NO power over me. The POWER of Christ IN me is all I need. Who I really am is all because of Jesus and the power of what He did for me. My complete identity is in Him. Why would I loose my thoughts in the lies of the deceiver when the truth is so evident and powerful?
I will continue to resist those voices that whisper in the quiet, crevices of my mind, I will tell them they lie. I will tell them the truth, I will tell them that because of Christ, all these things I fear He knows and holds dear, He will not forsake me, He will forever take care of me, He goes before me, behind me, and all around me. He walks before me, preparing the way and He allows all things to work together for my good, because He loves me.
So I will walk ahead, though this fearful place, through the voices around me saying I won't make it, and into the unknown, but only because I know that the peace of laying all my cares at His feet is real, saving and sweet, I know I will not be harmed, even in the darkest valley, He will forever and ever be at my side. My confidence is in Him alone.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Comfort and Christ
Who doesn't like to be comfortable?
My friends tease me all the time about how I just relax in my jeans and shirt or whatever outfit I've had on all day. Apparently that's not 'comfortable' in their minds. I'm fine with that, but really my point is not the difference of my friends & I with our relaxation clothing; instead I want to talk about how we all want comfort at some level.
Recently I have been challenged by the Spirit that I am comfortable. My life is surrounded by the comfort of believers. I live and work with people who are following after Christ and living for Him.
Ok, piece of cake, no big deal, whatever you may be thinking. I know I think that over and over again too. Sure I see people regularly and briefly interface with individuals in my building, however I have not branched out and shown the Love of Christ to them, I have not made the effort to be different than the rest of the walled-world around us. I guess I find that even just saying hi or making the effort to put others first in those brief interactions is not 'comfortable' for me and instead of doing what Christ would do, I avoid it altogether and conform to the rest of the world around me.
A few weeks ago, one of the leaders of my church asked me if I have gotten to know people in my building, I shamefully said no. I actually hadn't even thought of it.
Last night I came home from a wonderful Christ-centered wedding. Upon entering my building, checking my mail and casually greeting the door man, I attempted to go to my apartment--like normal, right? Then he stopped me. The door man, the one person I have met and interfaced with the most intentionality (mostly because he is extremely good looking and ALWAYS greets me by first name), he stopped me. He asked me where I am from because he had noticed my Carhart coat and knew I wasn't a Chicago girl. We then talked for about 10 minutes and eventually conversation came to Christianity and church. The conversation flowed so smoothly and I was nervous just because of that! I did not want to hide who the person of Christ is to me, but this was not comfortable either!
My friend came down into the lobby as we were talking, so our conversation ended, but as I went back to my apartment, I was more challenged in this area the Spirit has been working on me. My friend and I spoke for a long while about our fear in sharing the Gospel because of our own lack of faith or distrust of God. The conclusion we came to is that our lives should be examples of Christ. That is truly what I want, to be radiating Christ through my daily life and every interaction with anyone. I want it to be obvious that I follow Him, but not annoyingly so, I want it to be pure, real love of Christ. That come as you are type of love that is warm and welcoming, not condemning and in your face a turn off.
I hope that there are more conversations to come with this door man. I am challenged more now to be intentional with him as well as speak up in a loving way to others I see regularly in order to shine the love of Jesus.
Comfort, is not something high on the list of following Christ. I don't think we need to trash it all together, because honestly, sometimes in cultural situations that would not be appropriate at all, but there does need to be a sense in our personal lives that we are being stretched and challenged to not be so comfortable that we ignore sharing the Greatest News of all, that of Jesus Christ and the freeing life He gives.
My friends tease me all the time about how I just relax in my jeans and shirt or whatever outfit I've had on all day. Apparently that's not 'comfortable' in their minds. I'm fine with that, but really my point is not the difference of my friends & I with our relaxation clothing; instead I want to talk about how we all want comfort at some level.
Recently I have been challenged by the Spirit that I am comfortable. My life is surrounded by the comfort of believers. I live and work with people who are following after Christ and living for Him.
Ok, piece of cake, no big deal, whatever you may be thinking. I know I think that over and over again too. Sure I see people regularly and briefly interface with individuals in my building, however I have not branched out and shown the Love of Christ to them, I have not made the effort to be different than the rest of the walled-world around us. I guess I find that even just saying hi or making the effort to put others first in those brief interactions is not 'comfortable' for me and instead of doing what Christ would do, I avoid it altogether and conform to the rest of the world around me.
A few weeks ago, one of the leaders of my church asked me if I have gotten to know people in my building, I shamefully said no. I actually hadn't even thought of it.
Last night I came home from a wonderful Christ-centered wedding. Upon entering my building, checking my mail and casually greeting the door man, I attempted to go to my apartment--like normal, right? Then he stopped me. The door man, the one person I have met and interfaced with the most intentionality (mostly because he is extremely good looking and ALWAYS greets me by first name), he stopped me. He asked me where I am from because he had noticed my Carhart coat and knew I wasn't a Chicago girl. We then talked for about 10 minutes and eventually conversation came to Christianity and church. The conversation flowed so smoothly and I was nervous just because of that! I did not want to hide who the person of Christ is to me, but this was not comfortable either!
My friend came down into the lobby as we were talking, so our conversation ended, but as I went back to my apartment, I was more challenged in this area the Spirit has been working on me. My friend and I spoke for a long while about our fear in sharing the Gospel because of our own lack of faith or distrust of God. The conclusion we came to is that our lives should be examples of Christ. That is truly what I want, to be radiating Christ through my daily life and every interaction with anyone. I want it to be obvious that I follow Him, but not annoyingly so, I want it to be pure, real love of Christ. That come as you are type of love that is warm and welcoming, not condemning and in your face a turn off.
I hope that there are more conversations to come with this door man. I am challenged more now to be intentional with him as well as speak up in a loving way to others I see regularly in order to shine the love of Jesus.
Comfort, is not something high on the list of following Christ. I don't think we need to trash it all together, because honestly, sometimes in cultural situations that would not be appropriate at all, but there does need to be a sense in our personal lives that we are being stretched and challenged to not be so comfortable that we ignore sharing the Greatest News of all, that of Jesus Christ and the freeing life He gives.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Sing Prasies
I just really want to sing to my King!
For a good portion of the day I sat at my desk working on projects that have been waiting for a long time to be touched. Because of this, my music was on for a few hours!! But I got to the point where I just really wanted to be surrounded by many other followers and just declaring praise to our God.
Maybe I feel this way because we didn't have music worship time on Sunday at church, maybe I am having withdrawals after almost a whole year since being a student at Moody and attending required chapel at least 3 times a week with singing worship at nearly every one.
Right now I just want to be lost in crazy worship before my King. I want to sing and shout His praise and declare the truth about Him at the top of my lungs. I want to stand among the others who love Him and sing it wild!
For a good portion of the day I sat at my desk working on projects that have been waiting for a long time to be touched. Because of this, my music was on for a few hours!! But I got to the point where I just really wanted to be surrounded by many other followers and just declaring praise to our God.
Maybe I feel this way because we didn't have music worship time on Sunday at church, maybe I am having withdrawals after almost a whole year since being a student at Moody and attending required chapel at least 3 times a week with singing worship at nearly every one.
Right now I just want to be lost in crazy worship before my King. I want to sing and shout His praise and declare the truth about Him at the top of my lungs. I want to stand among the others who love Him and sing it wild!
Saturday, March 19, 2011
When I Grow Up
So when I was a little girl I dreamed of being a mommy. Seriously. My favorite past time with my sister Ruth was what we called "both moms". I don't remember how it all worked, but our imaginations ran wild. We would play mommies to our baby dolls, who had hand made clothes --even diapers-- from our mom. Our mom played as 'grandma' to our babies and sometimes 'grandma' would allow for these precious imagined beings to join us at the table for lunch.
That desire has to be the one that has been there the longest, to be a wife and a mom.
Sometime in my later childhood another aspiration came about during our church's missions week. I really felt God tugging at my heart to be a missionary.
For a while I thought this meant I would be a missionary doctor/nurse in Indonesia. As I began high school and realized each school year how much I disliked school, the reality of a medical future became very small and non-existent. The summer after I graduated high school and was denied to the one college I wanted to attend, I had a melt-down with my parents and told them that I did not want to go to school. All I wanted was to be a wife and mom. (However, there was not a man in the picture to speak of at all!) With the wisdom and patience of my wonderful parents, they kindly advised and directed me to continue pursuing college, if for nothing else, the experience and the importance to be 'educated' today.
The spring after that conversation with my parents I found myself all alone in a big city, at that school I wanted to attend, and pursuing a degree in International Ministry. Little did I know at that point in my life that being at this new place my life was on the way to incredible adventures. And there life lessons came that were so valuable as well as unforgettable relationships.
That was four years ago. Hard to believe that so much time has past since my parents left me here that cold January.
I guess I'd like to think that I have things more figured out now about what I am doing with my life. However, I feel even more uncertain of my future now that I am as some would say 'grown up'. I guess it could be said that there are some 'hang-ups' when I look at the dreams I have:
What I know to be true is that childhood desire to be a wife and mom is still there, although, maybe a little less fantasized.--the hang up I see here is this desire is not one I want to do alone, and there is no man in the present
I still have the pulling on my heart to see the people and places of the world, reaching the lost with the Good News.--the hang up here is I don't know at what capacity. I guess I always just pictured myself as a missionary wife, helping my husband with his work, wherever in the world that may be.
So I guess in summing it all up, these are still the things I want to do when I grow up. Not really sure what to do in the present, except for patiently wait and try to seek to know God more and more each day. Live for Him and trust in His timing. Much easier to write here than to live out.
That desire has to be the one that has been there the longest, to be a wife and a mom.
Sometime in my later childhood another aspiration came about during our church's missions week. I really felt God tugging at my heart to be a missionary.
For a while I thought this meant I would be a missionary doctor/nurse in Indonesia. As I began high school and realized each school year how much I disliked school, the reality of a medical future became very small and non-existent. The summer after I graduated high school and was denied to the one college I wanted to attend, I had a melt-down with my parents and told them that I did not want to go to school. All I wanted was to be a wife and mom. (However, there was not a man in the picture to speak of at all!) With the wisdom and patience of my wonderful parents, they kindly advised and directed me to continue pursuing college, if for nothing else, the experience and the importance to be 'educated' today.
The spring after that conversation with my parents I found myself all alone in a big city, at that school I wanted to attend, and pursuing a degree in International Ministry. Little did I know at that point in my life that being at this new place my life was on the way to incredible adventures. And there life lessons came that were so valuable as well as unforgettable relationships.
That was four years ago. Hard to believe that so much time has past since my parents left me here that cold January.
I guess I'd like to think that I have things more figured out now about what I am doing with my life. However, I feel even more uncertain of my future now that I am as some would say 'grown up'. I guess it could be said that there are some 'hang-ups' when I look at the dreams I have:
What I know to be true is that childhood desire to be a wife and mom is still there, although, maybe a little less fantasized.--the hang up I see here is this desire is not one I want to do alone, and there is no man in the present
I still have the pulling on my heart to see the people and places of the world, reaching the lost with the Good News.--the hang up here is I don't know at what capacity. I guess I always just pictured myself as a missionary wife, helping my husband with his work, wherever in the world that may be.
So I guess in summing it all up, these are still the things I want to do when I grow up. Not really sure what to do in the present, except for patiently wait and try to seek to know God more and more each day. Live for Him and trust in His timing. Much easier to write here than to live out.
Monday, March 14, 2011
Good Night My Someone
"Welcome home! I made you dinner!"
I long for the day when I can say that to you.
I look forward to the times we can sit together and laugh and cry.
I look forward to seeing your eyes when I stand before you in a white dress and begin a life of serving our God together.
I look forward to learning with you through the thick and the thin.
I look forward to each new day with the challenges that will come and the joy in the end.
I don't know where you are, and I know this sounds cheesy, but I plead before the throne of God for you. I don't know where you are or if we're years away from crossing paths. But I look forward to that day. Pray for me, I need patience, this waiting thing has been rough, but I wait in hope that it will all be worth it in the end, that you are definitely a gift from Above, that doing life with you will help us both bring more glory to our Father and demonstrate His love for all.
Good night my someone, wherever you are.
I long for the day when I can say that to you.
I look forward to the times we can sit together and laugh and cry.
I look forward to seeing your eyes when I stand before you in a white dress and begin a life of serving our God together.
I look forward to learning with you through the thick and the thin.
I look forward to each new day with the challenges that will come and the joy in the end.
I don't know where you are, and I know this sounds cheesy, but I plead before the throne of God for you. I don't know where you are or if we're years away from crossing paths. But I look forward to that day. Pray for me, I need patience, this waiting thing has been rough, but I wait in hope that it will all be worth it in the end, that you are definitely a gift from Above, that doing life with you will help us both bring more glory to our Father and demonstrate His love for all.
Good night my someone, wherever you are.
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