Something is Missing

I have this strong desire and longing to be a wife and a mom. I have always wanted this, but I feel like this desire has increased so much in the last few months. I know it is not only because of being with children 40+ hours a week, or the fact that most of my friends are married and are starting to have kids, but I know that part of it is because of the stage of life I'm in. I'm at the point in life that people start families.

But something is missing. I can't just wake up tomorrow and be a wife & mom. Something essential is missing.

A man.

But really, not just any man. That man. The one who exists somewhere, or so I hope.

I hope my desire to be a wife and mom is not just selfish, I want to think that I want to do life with a man and be his helper. And serve God at a greater capacity because of joining life with another person.

Maybe one day. For now, I'll just have to be "Aunt Rebecca" or "Auntie Reb" or "Aunt Bek" to all the little ones coming into this world because of my wonderful friends who are a little further down the road of 'starting a family'. I can be thankful for that and enjoy it.

I'll just wait. Maybe the day will come where I too will have a little one and that big, strong man to look after and care for and share life with.

Lord, be with him now, wherever he is.